PHARM Podcast 187 After too many drinks By Mitochondrial Eve
I talk a lot about the healthcare experience from the perspective of a bedside nurse in the ICU. I have a story about being a patient.
— Mitochondrial Eve (@BrowofJustice) July 28, 2017
After too many drinks – by Mitochondrial Eve
After too many drinks
after a long weekend of work
she told me the first true thing about herself
and this is what she said:
Did I ever tell you how I finally decided
to leave my first husband?
It was raining at the trailer park where we lived.
I was sitting in the car watching the drops
bleed down the windshield
when the song “Fast Car”
came on the radio, and
I realized I never felt like I belonged anywhere.
My life wasn’t a zero,
it was a deficit and it would never be more,
I would never be worth anything,
my children and I would live and die
in that same trailer park
watching puddles grow in the rain.
So I took them and I left.
But you know…
I carry that trailer park with me everywhere I go.
Someday I’m going to leave it and never look back.
Well, that’s good,
I said to say something.
This she ignores.
I take a drink, then another.
This is my trailer park,
I say to myself,
this bar with the scarred counter
and the thick shady glasses
and the haze and the plywood wall
and broke two bones with a right hook.
OU lost, I remember.
Adam smiles every time I come in,
serves me doubles as singles,
just keeps them coming,
what better way to watch
the hours run down the side of the glass
to puddle on the edge of my sleeve.
She rises, graceful despite the weight,
the weight she bears like a fifth pregnancy,
shoulders square and stocky.
It’s drafty in here.
Wish it would clear the air
but too much confession burdens the space between us,
too much and not enough.
I love you, I think.
One more round, I say.
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